In my experience, when I was deeply hurt by other people it always brought a transformative power into my life. Growing up is always a matter of trial and error in order to learn your boundaries and the world limits. That means that there is a lot of changing and moulding happening in life and it doesn’t come easy!
There are no life teachers as far as I know that can prepare you for the roller coaster of growing up; you just have to go out on stage and dance… The biggest changes happened to me through heartbreaks of many sorts, during the healing time that followed them.

The healing period is a very important time that lasts quite long where you don’t just put yourself back together, but also make room for a change in the process. What results after this transformation is a bettered version of yourself, where you have acquired new powers and can now confront certain situations that you didn’t know before. It’s similar to a vaccination process.
Also for what I can tell, the experience of healing is a personal experience: it’s you dealing with it on your own, at your time. Nobody can find a solution for you. It takes time because is your own process that needs to take place, so better to embrace it as much as you can.
It doesn’t feel good when you are in that time of healing, because it usually involves quite a bit of pain and suffering, and it’s hard to get through it. But the transformation is necessary and the gain is worth it.

“The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it…”
― Nicholas Sparks, At First Sight

“Even the smallest shift in perspective can bring about the greatest healing.”
― Joshua Kai, The Quantum Prayer: An Inspiring Guide to Love, Healing, and Creating the Best Life Possible

Violet Bloom Flowers Purple Blossom Plant

Normality, conformity and acceptance

People are wired to maintain their balance by avoiding what is diverse and uncomfortable.
This thought helped me understand people that are different from me, because I didn’t use to think like them.
Since I can remember I’ve always been very fascinated by diversity and this distinguished me from the majority of people and the way they think.
So this premise made it difficult for me to relate to most people and to fit in with everybody else.
In any case I don’t feel abnormal or anything of that sort. Only I am wired to think differently than most, probably because as a child I spent a lot of time by my self and that fuelled my imaginative and creative abilities.
Now, I found huge value in my way of thinking – that is when I’ve been allowed to put it in action by a scared conformist world – during my life.
Even then, I came to change my thinking after all because of interactions with people who are different from me that harmed me in a few occasions. And that made me question my view and thoughts.

“You must have wished a million times to be normal.”
“I’ve wished I had two heads. Or that I was invisible. I’ve wished for a fish’s tail instead of legs. I’ve wished to be more special.”
“Not normal?”
― Katherine Dunn, Geek Love

“Almost everyone prefers normality because normality brings comfort and security. But when you think about it, normality hinders the reason why you are on this earth.”
― Euginia Herlihy


Self Discovery

“If I were surrounded by people who always approved of me, I wouldn’t need such a deep relationship with my own sense of right and wrong. And you know what that means? It means that other people’s approval is actually a hindrance, more than a helper, when it comes to self-discovery.”
― Vironika Tugaleva



“The most profound personal growth does not happen while reading a book or meditating. It happens in the throes of conflict, when you are angry, afraid, frustrated. It happens when you are doing the same old thing and you suddenly realize that you have a choice.”
― Vironika Tugaleva